cronechronicler

Sometimes everything has to be enscribed across the heavens so you can find the one line already written inside you. Sometimes it takes a great sky to find that small, bright, and indescribable wedge of freedom in your own heart. David Whyte

Everyday Inspiration Day Five: “What Is Real?”

It doesn’t happen all at once, said the Skin Horse (to the Velveteen Rabbit). You  become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off (by children who play with you), and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and  very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.   From The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams.

I discovered this quote from a children’s book  long after my children were the age for bedtime stories. I was going through a divorce when I first read these words. They echoed the words of a counselor who told me I had to go through this difficult time, not around it. What the Skin Horse said about being Real comes back to me now that age is actually loosening my joints, I no longer have vision in one of my eyes and I am a bit shabby compared to my younger years. I  do still have my hair, now grown white.

Aging has challenges I do not expect to escape. Still, being Real is pretty wonderful. It helps me see that I am much more than what is visible on the outside. I’ve gained self-acceptance,  wisdom and strength  letting myself just Be.

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Everyday Inspiration Day Four: Portal

Grand Central Station of legend and stories
High arched ceiling, light’s golden glow
Promise of infinite charmed possibilities
Sky’s the limit. Where will I go?

I remember Thanksgivings when bound for New York
College girls promised to “meet under the clock”.
I never did. My single journey was Thanksgiving ’64
With husband and baby son Bobby in tow.

Before  sun was up we arrived bleary-eyed
No sleeping with baby in misnamed sleeping car
Hurried through Grand Central then realized
Bobby’s winter hat was not on his head.

Scurried back to train tracks and lo and behold
Perching there on a pole where a kind stranger had put it
Was the little blue hat. That was for me a beginning
To journey afar and trust the wide world.

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Everyday Inspiration Day Three: Home

Home is anywhere
For years or just a moment
A place to belong

Somewhere I’m welcome
Sky vast overhead shelter
Ground steadies my feet

Air breathes me alive
My food nature’s rich harvest
Night sounds hush my sleep

Rain brings me water
Rivers sparkle with beauty
Giver of all life

Earth’s people suffer
Violence rends lives asunder
I pray they find home

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Everyday Inspiration Day Two: Things I’m Good At

Making a list of what I’m good at tells a  story about life for me at the present time with a few old “talents” thrown in.

1. I enjoy problem-solving. I figure out things on my computer intuitively and then don’t know how I did it. I muddle through. I use odd things around the house as tools, like my old nut cracker to unscrew stubborn jar lids.

2. I take good care of my nineteen house plants. I find where they like to sit according to how much light they like and how much water they need.

3. I am a good mother and grandmother. That has always been the  most important thing to me. I make mistakes and learn from them. I love my family dearly.

4. I’m good at talking to strangers. I learn about things I would never have thought of. I get to see the world through a different lens.

5. I love being by myself with time to reflect and just do nothing. I like silence and peace. It’s a good time for writing.

6. I am an experienced traveler. I’m good at choosing where I want to go, making reservations and packing. I am reasonably patient in airports when things don’t go right. I have never yet had to spend the night in one.

7. I’m a competent money manager. I’ve balanced my checkbook monthly for years.

8. I tell stories and have a huge storehouse of memories to draw on. I’m also a good listener for other people.

9. I gave away my car, gave up driving, and discovered a whole new lifestyle I like better all the time. I meet different people. I depend on knowing the weather like a farmer because it governs my errand-running on foot. Ice is my nemesis.

10. I am dependable and know how to organize things.

11. I  trust change (though I’m not crazy about it) and have recreated my life several times.

12. I am working on figuring out aging. I trust this process.

13. I’m good at throwing out things and recycling. I like to find new homes for stuff I’m not using.

14. I’m good at making and keeping to-do lists. I write everything on my paper calendar so I won’t forget.

15. I’m good at letting go and moving on.

 

 

 

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Everyday Inspiration Day One: Why Do I Write?

Writing is the joy and  purpose that putting life experience into words gives me. It happens when I go quiet and lose myself in the actions of the sky, trees, wind and small animals outside my window. It happens when I need to  tie up loose feelings from my own life experience. Experience is the key word.

I write from the perspective of a woman who will turn eighty in two months. I know what it is to have  felt the same way inside as long as I can remember. I know what it is to feel my body aging and live with limitations. Best of all I am discovering the unique joy of the changes I experience. I am changing and like a Janus face can look backward  and forward through a rainbow of experience arching through time from my early years to a still mysterious future.

When I started my blog I knew I could write.  I did not know I have been given the gift of writing poetry. I am a wordy person by nature and reducing my words to the seventeen syllables of a haiku gives me focus. I love to find just the perfect word and word field to express myself. I love writing poetry because at least in the Word Press world there are few rules about complete sentences. I love leaving spaces for readers to fill in with their sense of what my words mean in their lives.

I write because I have stories to pass down to my children and grandchildren. I write for the pleasure of remembering places I’ve been in my travels.

Writing makes me whole.

 

 

 

 

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